Monday, June 13, 2011

Decisions, decisions...

I want to start with this short amusing video emphasizing the relationship evolution of a man courting a women. Some of you would have already seen or heard about the following. This is a humorous outtake on what is a common relationship occurrence nowadays… enjoy.

How often do you check your text messages? More on this in a future blog. Lets get into it.

There are literally hundreds of books aimed at assisting men with the dating game. How many have you read? Most would have read zero, none, nada, niente. Yet there would be many of you that have read – “Men Are From Mars, Women Are From Venus”. Why did you read that book and what did you get from it?

I am not knocking that book or other relationship books for that matter, the more knowledge of any one subject the better-equipped one usually is to deal with that topic. I just don’t think this is the case with men, women and relationships. The internet has complicated the world. Google the word “relationship” – 770 million results. Where do you start? One book can’t hold all the answers.  Can this blog? Doubt it, but one thing it will do is give you a true insight into Men…good and the not so good.

In the last blog I discussed, “The Approach”, that one simple word. Hello. What does it all mean? That depends on who says it and how it is said.

Information Session one is about to commence, get comfy:

If you took the time to look at the survey, I asked three quick questions which many of you answered. Thank you. Let’s begin to separate the men from the “players”.

Most of you who took the survey answered the way I thought you might. You all thought that the guy who approached you and commented on your earrings and continued on was someone you found interesting. Yet the simple male who walked up and casually said “hi”, was given a cold response. This was someone you would rather avoid. Have you asked yourself why?

We have all heard that saying that nice guys finish last; you women are the reason why! You have your blinkers on, you are not seeing the big picture, and you are thinking about what makes you happy now. This instant, this bar, café, restaurant, nightspot, shopping centre. Little do you see that what may make you smile today will make you sad tomorrow. I am not asking you to settle for substandard, just take into account the bigger picture.

As there are literally thousands of books, millions of pages of relationship content, there is also the same amount of content readily available to men with the ability to utilise it to their benefit. Here’s how. Think of the following situation, you would’ve all witnessed this at some stage:

Man approaches you/your friends shyly, most likely dared by his friends. He says “hi” and awaits a reply. Occasionally you will respond with “hello” and await his next masterpiece which is usually: 

·      Do you have the time?

·      Could I ask you a question?

·      Do you come here often?

·      Haven’t I seen you here before?

Am I the only one who is dry reaching after reading the above? It’s boring, blasé, and offers nothing new to take you away from the common existence you are living. So, automatically you disregard Mr. Shy and politely or impolitely give him the cold shoulder. 

Let’s try again:

You are out with a friend, or a group of friends. A man approaches with some swagger and asks you or your friend a direct question: “ Excuse me,  I was hoping you could help me with a slight conundrum”. Women love conundrums. “My friend has been dating a girl for two months, the other night his girlfriend went to his house a saw a photo of him with his ex girlfriend still in a frame in the living room. Do you think she was wrong to ask him to take it down?” As you or your friends begin to offer an opinion, he continues, “I should make mention that she recently passed away”.


Could you turn this guy away? He seems genuine, he has a heartfelt conundrum and it would seem like he needs some female advice. Let the games begin…

I want to pose this question to you. If some random guy can approach you and ask you/your friends a question as complex as that, what makes you think that you are the only female or group of females he has asked that question to? I can guarantee you, any male who approaches and opens with an introduction like that or similar is a "player". You are just his next experiment, this is something he has or is still attempting to master.

So, how is Mr. Shy looking now? You still think he’s boring? Yep.

Next blog I will continue the player’s conversation with the group of girls. I will map out his next move…moves. You may be surprised.


This blog is for the women of the world; tell all your female friends, send them the link. On the right hand side of this page you will find the links to subscribe and follow me on twitter. Utilise them and help me help you.

If you have any questions at all…ask away below.

Thinking of you and you alone (bleh!)…


1 comment:

  1. Just discovered this blog, and getting up to date with the posts. So what you are saying is give the guy a chance? If a guy just came up and said hello to me i would be more inclined to talk to him, because it seems bolder than the players scheme. Or am i being a woman and looking too deep into this.

    Impressed with your work but, ill keep on reading!